


Swelling Heart

by eatwill



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2014-10-05
Packaged: 2018-02-19 23:54:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2407550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eatwill/pseuds/eatwill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean finally goes out of rehab for his heroin addiction. He will learn that hell is not always what he thinks it is, and that there are angels to help him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first attempt at writing fanfiction. I was inspired by the band Los Campesinos! and especially the song : Heart Swells/Pacific Daylight Time, check the lyrics and you'll get what I mean. Hope you'll enjoy ! :)

Dean hated every part of this. He was doing it for his brother and for himself as the doctors told him. Rehab was exactly like he imagined it when he was a teenager and all his favorite rock stars were going there. It was a building full of sad people lying to themselves every day that they can live without their addiction, until the day they believe it enough that the doctors let them out in the world of temptation. It’s been eight months since Dean first stepped a foot in there and he couldn’t wait to get out. It’s been eight months since he didn’t take heroin. Eight months of ups and downs. When he realized it, Dean stopped wandering in the corridors and smiled. He remembered thinking he couldn’t do it. He remembered the first month, the withdrawal of the substance from his system, the screams, the tears, the cold. And now here he was, last week of rehab. He grabbed a folded picture in his pocket, a picture of him with his brother, on Sam’s first day at college. That was before Dean went on a roller-coaster to hell. And now it will all be the same. Finally, he will be with his brother, sober, and will be able to actually enjoy drinking beers while watching the Superbowl with him. Dean couldn’t be more happy and wished he could just open his eyes and be at that exact moment. He went to his room whistling, lied down on the bed, grabbed his diary and wrote everything he just thought about.  
  



	2. Home will be here.

That was it, today was the day Dean would get the fuck out of this place. First he had to go to this stupid appointment with his psychiatrist to explain for the fourth time that he has to continue his sessions with him, that he can call him anytime, that a relapse can happen, blah blah blah. Dean was just thinking about Sam who was supposed to pick him up. They planned on going for a beer and man, Dean was so excited about that.  
-“ Dean, are you listening ?” said Doctor Shurley  
\- “Yes Doc, I know that I can call you, I have your card in my wallet don’t worry.”  
-“ I’m just saying Dean, your case was pretty severe, you need to take it slow.”  
-“Yeah, yeah I know.”  
-“ Well, anyway, I’m very proud of you Dean, you did a good work and I hope that it will all turn out okay for you.”  
-“Don’t be so dramatic Doc, you haven’t seen the last of me.”  
\- “Indeed, by the way you need to make an appointment at the reception.”  
-“Will do, thank you Doc, for everything”  
They shook hands like adventurers that just came home from a big secret ride. As he closed the door, Dean breathed out, he couldn’t believe he would actually miss seeing Doctor Shurley every day. He walked to the reception, and on his way said goodbye to the few patients he knew, and to the nurses. He made his appointment and directed himself to the entrance door. He stopped for a minute. He was scared as hell to go out. Excited and scared. Was he able to make it ? Going through "the real life" without anything to get him away from it ? Was he strong enough ? He was shaking, that little voice in his head had the same sound that the one of his father. He tried to hush it by repeating the mantra Doctor Shurley kept on telling him when Dean had panic attacks. He managed to calm down enough to find the strength to go outside. A few months ago he decided that he had let the crippling fear of failure win too often, he decided that it will never happen again. He just had to take it one step at a time. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven.Eight. Nine. Nine steps and he was out. He breathed out, relieved, nine little steps to mark the most important moment in his life. Nine little steps. He felt drizzle falling on his cheeks, a little wind blowing gently in his hair, people talking about something else than alcohol and drugs. It was like Dean entered into another world. He looked for Sam but couldn’t find him. He continued to look like a dog who had lost his master, trying to mute the voices murmuring that Sam had abandoned him. He closed his eyes, repeating himself "Everything is okay. Sam is running late as usual. It's okay, you are okay." He opened his eyes on the man standing in front of him, smoking a cigarette. "Hey man, I'm sorry to bother you, can I have one of these ? The man noticed Deans trembling hand, and smiled.  
“Sure.”  
“Are you going in or going out ?” Dean asked lighting his cigarette.  
“Going in, I mean, I’m new here, I’m a nurse and this is my first day.”  
“Oh okay, you are the kind of guy I used to hate for several months.” Dean joked.  
“And you must be the kind of guys I’m going to hate for several months.”  
Dean laughed.  
“Dean Winchester, at your service.”  
“Castiel Novak.”  
They shook hands. Dean somehow wasn't nervous anymore. Talking to another human being was sort of relaxing. Besides, Castiel Novak had something in him that was soothing. Dean heard a car pull over, and recognized the sound of the engine, he took a look and there was his brother. He had not changed a bit, still had those long silky hair, and that smile that lit up Dean's world.  
“Well, that’s my ride, good luck on your first day Smoker Boy”  
Castiel thanked him and watched him disappear in Sam’s black car. For a first day it began pretty good, he tought.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll post next chapter next week-end probably, still not happy about it but meh, hope you enjoyed so far ! :D


End file.
